How to break free from procrastination and achieve your life goals
1 September 2024
Does this sound familiar? ’I can’t stop procrastinating. Why can’t I be more productive”?
I hear this a lot from clients, colleagues, friends and family. It can seem the drive to do more and more ends up causing you to do less and less as the urge to procrastinate kicks in.
At some time, most of us have felt overwhelmed by the almost impossible to achieve to do lists we set ourselves. Or we may have work loads that just can’t be done well in the time we have available. Having an ever increasing list of tasks to do makes it difficult to focus on and find the time to do them. This can lead to frustration and judging yourself and your performance. You may start to criticise yourself for not making enough progress. Then, you may find it hard to set aside time for rest and relaxation, or don’t get around to exercising or eating well.
The pull to procrastinate is common. I know I’ve delayed getting down to tasks I don’t enjoy, such as doing my accounts. And I’ve been known to take extra time to make decisions, even when I know they’re important. If this happens from time to time, it doesn’t really matter. But if procrastinating is becoming a way of life, it may be stopping you from feeling happy and fulfilled.
What is procrastination?
Procrastination is the voluntary delay of taking action even when you know that it could have a negative impact. It’s a familiar practice for many people and often leads to frustration, stress, guilt, and a sense of failure. Research has shown that about 20% of adults are chronic procrastinators, regularly putting off tasks in a way that adversely impacts their daily lives. This rises to 50% for studentsi.
Persistent procrastination can affect your performance and work and can also make you feel bad about yourself.
If you struggle with procrastinating, you may experience:
-
Consistently putting off tasks, even when they are important to you, you have deadlines or there’s consequences from getting them done.
-
Finding it difficult to start new tasks. It often feels as if something is stopping you from beginning things. To avoid these uncomfortable feelings, you may stop looking at the reminders you’ve set yourself or the tasks you need to do. Instead, you spend time trying not to think about them.
-
Distracting yourself by finding other things to do with your time. Even when you know you need to complete a task, you find yourself scrolling on your phone suddenly needing to tidy or clean, or going in search of something to eat.
-
Lacking motivation. You find it hard to find the energy or motivation to complete tasks even though you know they’re important. When tasks don’t fit in with your interests or values, it’s easy to put them off. You’re more likely to procrastinate when the job that needs doing feels boring, repetitive or pointless. For more on motivation, and how to improve it, click here
-
Increased stress and anxiety. You experience stress, anxiety, frustration, guilt or shame as tasks remain unfinished. The more you procrastinate, the more you feel like this. The pressure increases as you’re trying to get things done in less time.
- Finding it difficult to make decisions. Overthinking or worrying about making the wrong decision eats up your time It stops you from starting or completing things and puts you under more pressure. Check out these blogs to find out more on overcoming worry and overthinking.
What causes procrastination?
-
Focusing on doing things perfectly. If you tend to be a perfectionist, worrying about making mistakes can stop you in your tracks. Tasks are put off and off as you worry you won’t be able to do them well enough. This impossibly high standard may be one you have set for yourself . The worry means you keep putting off the task. This results is a cycle of delaying tasks until the “perfect” moment comes along. Unfortunately, this moment is rare, if it happens at all. You end up with less time left to complete the task, only reinforcing your worriesii.
-
Being caught up in people pleasing. If you have a strong need to please others, you can end up procrastinating on your tasks as you prioritise helping them. You may take on too many commitments to avoid disappointing other people. This leaves little time or energy for your own work or personal life. As a result, you may end up feeling overwhelmed and overstretched. These feelings often lead to procrastination as it feels harder and harder to complete your own tasksiii.
Find out more about how to let go of people pleasing here.
-
Productivity anxiety often leads to procrastination. The pressure to always be productive can result in anxiety about doing enough or being efficient. It can make you feel as if you’re being left behind as everyone else is being so productive. You can end up feeling as if you can never catch up or do as well as others and blame yourself for not doing enough. This anxiety can stop you in your tracks and makes it hard to start or complete tasksiv.
-
Human beings care more about the present than the future. Known as temporal discounting, it means you’re more concerned with what’s happening here and now, rather than with what may happen in the future. For instance, the enjoyment you get from watching tv now often outweighs the long-term costs or benefits of doing (or not doing) your work. It’s easy to believe that you’ll do it tomorrow and that it will be different tomorrow. Added to this, when you put off a task, you feel a sense of relief. That sense of relief leads you to continue to procrastinate and so the cycle continues.
When you’re trying to work on a task that comes with feelings of anxiety or insecurity, the threat detector part of the brain (called the amygdala), responds to the task as it would to danger. So, you may understand putting off the task will create more stress in the future, but your brain is still wired to be more concerned with getting rid of the threat now. And procrastination does just that.
Find out more about how your body reacts to stress here.
Breaking free from procrastination
It’s possible to break free from procrastination. When I work with clients who struggle with procrastination, we work together to change the thoughts, feelings and behaviour that are holding them back. We always work at your pace. I take time to support you to develop the skills you need to make changes. Together, we find ways to manage anxiety and other feelings so you can complete tasks. We work together to develop strategies to overcome fear of failing, perfectionism and people pleasing. I aim to help you to become confident in your own ability to take action and to do the things that are important to you.
Change is possible
If this sounds like you, just like Martin, you too are capable of change. It takes courage, but it can be done. When I work with people who are caught up in procrastination, I listen to all their worries and fears and help them to see there is another way. After that, I support them to make changes at a pace that is right for them. We work together to develop a step by step approach to being able to focus and be more productive.
If you too are caught up in procrastination and it’s getting in the way of doing the things that are meaningful to you, there are steps you can take to change.
Try these techniques to help you.
1. Be kind to yourself
When you procrastinate, it can easily kick in that inner critical voice. As a result, this voice will tell you you’ve failed and it’s always going to be like this. It’s normal to criticise yourself believing it will help you to take action. Even so, what usually happens is the criticism leads to more procrastination.
Researchers found that if you can be kind to yourself when you procrastinate, you will end up doing it less. They studied students who were able to forgive themselves for procrastinating when revising for an exam. As a result, those students ended up procrastinating less when it came to their next exami.
Other research discovered being kind and understanding to yourself makes it less likely you’ll procrastinate. That’s because you experience less negative self-judgment and more motivation to improveii.
So how do you do start to be kind to yourself? You could start by remembering when you have managed to complete tasks in the past. What did you say or do to motivate yourself? Could you do that again? Or you may think of the benefits of finishing the task or something you like about it. Similarly, you could also imagine what others would say about the completed task. Or, try checking into how you’ll feel about yourself if you manage to finish it on time without putting it off.
2. Use self hypnosis to help you
Having a clear image of yourself in the future can help with procrastination as the future becomes less abstract and feels more realiii. Self hypnosis is a powerful tool to help you to experience all the benefits of achieving your task. It allows you to get a real sense of how you will feel, think and act once the task is completed.
To do self hypnosis
Close your eyes and relax your body completely. Stay connected with feeling relaxed and imagine yourself in the future having completed your task on time and with ease. Get a sense of how you’ll feel being productive and confident in your abilities. You could imagine going through the day as this productive and confident version of yourself. See how you approach tasks now. Picture feeling comfortable whatever you have to do and all the benefits to you that will come from it.
Self hypnosis is an effective technique you can learn to use. You can use it to harness the power of your imagination to improve confidence and motivation. Find out more about self hypnosis and how it can help you here.
3. Play a game with yourself
Let go of thinking about completing the task as a whole or even a part of it. It can feel overwhelming and stop you from starting. Instead, think of the smallest next action you could take. Don’t put yourself under any pressure do it. Rather, see it as a possibility, not something you have to do.
It can help to imagine you’re an actor playing a role. For instance, try thinking about getting into your role by asking yourself, “ What’s the next action I’d take on this if I were going to do it, even though I’m not?” It could be you’d turn on your computer, or look at your email. Maybe you would read the title of a paper. Or it could be you’d take out your gym shoes. You don’t need to wait to be in the right mood to start, as the right time may never come along. But, if you imagine taking the first, smallest possible step you may just find yourself starting to take action.
4. Get clear on your values
Getting clear on your values can help you to spend more time on the things that matter to you. Similarly, it can help you to let go of the things that don’t matter. You’re less likely to procrastinate if the tasks are important to you. Writing about your values helps you to identify what counts to you. What’s more, research shows writing about your values can improve your health and motivation.
To get started, spend ten minutes writing about one of the values that’s meaningful to you. It could be family, marriage/couples/intimate relationship, parenting, friends, work, education or training, fun, spirituality, community, health, environment or creativity. As you start to write, ask yourself,
What do I care about in this area? What do I want to do in this area that reflects this caring? Where in my life has this value been important? What do I admire about other people who pursue this value? How can I have this value more in my life?
Try to focus on the qualities of your life as you want to live it. Qualities that are important to you. There is no right or wrong. It’s about what is important to you. Then take time to focus on the actions you want to take that help you to live this value in your life.
For more science backed ways to manage procrastination, check out this fabulous blog by James Clear of Atomic Habits fame
Letting go of procrastination can take time. Each step can be learnt and built upon. By taking these steps you can start to live your life on your own terms.
Would you like to make living life easier, right now? Get your free Live Life on Your Terms recording here and begin to live your life with confidence.
iRozental, A. & Carlbring, P. (2014). Understanding and Treating Procrastination: A Review of a Common Self-Regulatory Failure. Psychology, 5, 1488-1502. doi:10.4236/psych.2014.513160.
iiFlett, G.L., Hewitt, P.L., Martin, T.R. (1995). Dimensions of Perfectionism and Procrastination. In: Procrastination and Task Avoidance. The Springer Series in Social Clinical Psychology. Springer, Boston, MA. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4899-0227-6_6
iiiBurka, J. B., & Yuen, L. M. (2008). Procrastination: Why You Do It, What to Do about It Now. Cambridge, MA: Da Capo Press.
ivRozental, A. & Carlbring, P. (2014). Understanding and Treating Procrastination: A Review of a Common Self-Regulatory Failure. Psychology, 5, 1488-1502. doi:10.4236/psych.2014.513160.
iWohl, M. J. A., Pychyl, T. A., & Bennett, S. H. (2010). I forgive myself, now I can study: How self-forgiveness for procrastinating can reduce future procrastination. Personality and Individual Differences, 48(7), 803–808. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2010.01.029
iiSirois, F. M. (2013). Procrastination and Stress: Exploring the Role of Self-compassion. Self and Identity, 13(2), 128–145. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298868.2013.763404
iiiHershfield HE. Future self-continuity: how conceptions of the future self transform intertemporal choice. Ann N Y Acad Sci. 2011 Oct;1235:30-43. doi: 10.1111/j.1749-6632.2011.06201.x. PMID: 22023566; PMCID: PMC3764505.